Sooj

Full, Loved, Enough

Are you breathing today? Are you centered and okay?

Loving Prana like you wanna, it’s the natural way.

Sister, look at your curves.

Never let me hear you say

“how I wish this ugly piece of me would melt away.”

We are down with the booty,

down with the breasts,

but we’re hatin’ on the belly and we never let it rest.

I fight it too, every day I forget to breathe,

turn away from the mirror and the strength I see,

but I come back around like a pop song.

I see the whole picture, and ain’t nothin’ wrong.

There is more than one healthy shape in this world.

If you’re good to yourself, it’s all good, girl.

-WIP, “Full, Loved, Enough” by Renée & Sooj, aka Zeze Oiseau

This is gonna sound incredibly sappy and saccharine, but it’s true.

I’ve had female friends (cis, trans, fluid, and more) of all sizes and shapes and sorts, all my life. I’m fortunate to be someone who has a very hard time seeing ‘ugly’. I don’t feel the need to judge. I don’t make “beauty ideal” comparisons, not of people I care about.

That includes a whole lot of fans and a whole lot of friends. 🙂

It’s difficult for me to explain: not really seeing something that I just don’t see.

New Year’s Blessing

Should you lose yourself in kisses

when the midnight bells begin to ring,

be careful with the wishes

that a midnight kiss is bound to bring.

May magic guard your footsteps

and your heart this coming year.

May all your dreams come calling

as you will and as you dare.

So mote! Here’s to a happy 2015. Thanks for a gorgeous year, everyone!

Close at Christmas

The Stolen Season album has taken me much longer to complete than I ever imagined it would, but my own preliminary mixes for the album are finished! I completed them on December 23rd. I’m waiting on feedback from a few trusted fellow engineers before I contact my mastering engineer and replication company.

I’m considering a soft digital release as soon as possible after I get feedback from my colleagues. Hopefully, that means I can have all of my final, FINAL mixes completed by New Year’s. When I do make that goal, I will post the unmastered version of the album and make it available for immediate download and purchase.

In the meantime, my photographers, visual artists, and layout artist are working with me on the design of the physical CD. If we bust our booties, and if my mastering engineer and replication company have room for my project in their work schedule, we’ll have the physical version of the album available by my birthday at the end of February.

Whew.

I hope you’ve had a Happy Holy Holly Day! I have.

My mother’s cats are every bit as sweet as my cats are. 🙂

The Magic of the Season

The magic of the season is everywhere. We can find it in all sorts of places, people, events, and things. One way I find it is in the tradition of hanging up the Christmas tree ornaments my late father made. They are wooden ornaments which he turned on his lathe. I was pretty small when he made them, five or six, and I’ve been delighted by them since the first time I ever saw them. Dad’s been gone for ten years now, but it always gives me a lift to hold these simple, elegant ornaments in my hands. Dad loved working with wood, and he created some truly beautiful things. His wood shop was a magical place to me when I was growing up, and he was the kind of dad who would let me keep him company out there. I have fond memories of watching him work, reading books to him while sitting on his work stool. Most people remember my father as a music teacher, but a very special few have examples of his woodwork in their homes, their churches, and their lives.

No two of the ornaments are the same. I took some photos of them after hanging them on my mother’s Christmas tree yesterday. I hope they make you smile.

Bring Back the Light

<a href="http://music.sjtucker.com/track/solstice-night">Solstice Night by SJ Tucker</a>
Now comes the Solstice Night
I wish you safe and sound
whether snow be light
or heavy on the ground.

Our hearts bring back the light
as all the earth must do.
May stars fill up our sight
with wishes coming true.

My wish this Solstice Night
is grace and peace to you.

Now comes the time of year
when shadow yields the throne,
the lords of Oak and Holly,
the dance that must be done.

Keep faith and keep your candle.
The sun is sure to rise
o’er the sleepy fields of winter,
bringing beauty to our eyes.

Counterpoint lyrics
(inspired by “Shalom to You” by Carlton Raymond Young & Elise S. Eslinger)

Shalom to you now
Shalom, my friend
May bliss and beauty
bless you, my friend
Through all your living
and through your loving,
winter hearth and home
be your own Shalom.

*

Upon this Solstice Night
I wish you safe and sound
whether snow be light
or heavy on the ground.

Our hearts bring back the light
as all the world must do.
May stars fill up our sight
with wishes coming true.

My wish this Solstice Night
is grace and peace to you.

Stolen Season greeting cards up now!

One of my pirate sisters suggested the other day, after seeing the images in this blog post, that I offer greeting cards for solstice of the images. 🙂 Kirk Lanier, my gracious photographer, told me that sounded great, gave his permission, and told me to sell a million. Yesterday I went through the fairly friendly process of setting up a Zazzle store, and now I’ve got one greeting card and one notecard design posted!

This is the photo available on either a greeting card or a notecard right now. Sorry we didn’t think of this in time for you to have them for the Solstice! Next year. ((nod-nod))

The store is currently very bare bones, but this is an experiment. If Zazzle and I continue to get along, I will consider posting more designs and photos. Maybe I can get my act together and actually share my years-long backlog of random photography with you all!

Check out my Zazzle store

I get about $1 for every card. That’s not nearly as big a return as I get on CD sales or downloads, but I’m still looking forward to designing cards and stuff to share.

Other mundania: The best friends are the ones who stop by with adorable toddler in tow to bring you homemade chicken soup when you’ve been sick. Thank you, Melissa and Cora!!

New!kitty Gawain is still doing fine and has integrated himself into the household with hardly a bump. Even Pooshka is mellowing about the situation- sources say the two boys were seen on the same couch together at one point. Gawain’s main activities continue to be napping, purring, snuggling, and now playing!

Bright morning thoughts

Thought the First: this statement by a Heathen group in the Bay area is one of the best, no-nonsense examples of an oath of solidarity I may ever read, and you should read it. This is what our future norm looks like, if we commit to it and keep it alive. This is what I hope to see more of, what I myself will work toward. This matters. Black lives matter. Well said and well done.

Thought the Second: Bekah Kelso had her premier online concert last night, and it was great fun! She’s broadcasting another one with her full band as Bekah Kelso and The Fellas on January 28, via Concert Window.

Thought the Third and Most Fuzzy:

It got too cold out to continue working in my (only cursorily insulated) studio yesterday, so I moved operations back into the main house. It’s Arkansas weather in December, though, so it’ll probably change back to warmer temperatures before I’m done. 🙂 The last two mixes for the new record are coming along nicely. I’m beginning to think that my hardest work is done.

Moving back into the house to work has some side benefits. This morning, I’m sitting at my nifty homemade fold-down desk on the ground floor, watching my partner and our cats radiate contentment as I type. Well. Some are radiating more content than others just now.

Dancing in the Dark

Wintertime in Arkansas can be downright strange. It’s a wild night outside as I write, safe indoors, listening to my wind chimes rock a wild ballet. In spite of the impending winter solstice, I was outside in a t-shirt for part of the afternoon. Weird.

Wild and windy nights fire creativity and magic. I’ve had two very productive work shifts in my little recording studio over the past two evenings. (Yes, the cold is on its way out at last. Thanks for the well-wishes!) I’m closing in on completion of the new record, bit by bit. It feels good, especially now that I’m down to working on the two songs which have intimidated me the most throughout this process. It’s not that I worry I can’t do them justice, I just really really REALLY want to make them sound epic.

After tonight, I can honestly say I feel like I’m getting close. Possibly even leveling up.

Songs in the Forest- Gratitude, Creativity, and of course Cats

For the past few days, I’ve been fighting my first cold since April. It’s on its way out, thanks to much rest and tea and soup. Gone are the days when I can push through an epic virus and keep working, it seems. A great deal of my time has been spent flat on the couch, without oomph enough to do anything beyond checking social media. And thank goodness for all of you there, and all of your posts! You’ve kept me smiling for days when bright spots were few. Blogs and Twitter and Tumblr are a way we can all entertain and educate each other for cheap- as an entertainer, I can appreciate the simplicity of this, despite my occasionally frustrating love-hate relationship with social media. Thank you all for giving me lots to look at and think about when my energy’s too sapped by viruses and sneezing to get out and do things!

In spite of the epic snot battle, I have gotten plenty of good work done on the next record this week. I’ve only got two mixes left that need a first complete draft, and the rest of the songs are well on their way to being ready to send to my mastering engineer. I’m still hopeful that I can post a digital release on my listening page before Christmas!

The shopping cart system here on my main website has apparently been mysteriously losing orders for months. We’re working to fix the problem now. If you’re hoping to get a physical copy of something of mine before Yule is over, go ahead and order through my web store here, but make sure to use Paypal if you can. I get a direct email every time a Paypal payment goes through, so I’ll be watching closely for messages.

Part of my lack of energy today is due to the fact that our house was under siege at dawn. I heard some minor catlike disturbance going on downstairs before sunrise, so I tiptoed downstairs to investigate. Sure enough, we had an intruder. He was a very sweet, seemingly well-mannered fuzzy intruder, but an intruder nonetheless. My cat Pooshka was on guard against the threat: a young, un-neutered bobtailed male kitty, with short fur and a coloring that I think cat breeders would call cream tabby (pale silvery fawn or red, with subtle white stripes).

This little man’s been coming around for about a week now, not for the first time. He was also singing his own song outside my recording space last night, putting studio kitty extraordinaire Pooshka on high alert. Ryan and I are not prepared to take on a third feline, and our two cats aren’t sure about it, either. The problem, of course, is that he’s darling, very affectionate, intelligent, and adept at finding the soft spots of cat people. This is a cat who’s been around cat people, I’m certain, otherwise he wouldn’t already know how to flop over in front of me, insinuate his way onto my lap with no invitation, or (he actually did this) LEAP FROM THE GROUND into my arms while I’m standing in the yard. This last leads me to believe that he’s also pretty healthy and strong.

Bass Blizzard!

From time to time, I moonlight as bassist for my friends.

My buddy and bandmate Ben Deschamps in Toronto just uploaded a new instrumental tune, on which he was nice enough to let me play my 5-string bass!

Visit his page to listen to the tune, “Ninety-nine at Nine”, and read about what inspired it. It’s a traveling song. Actually, it’s a driving-through-a-blizzard song. I’m home safe at the moment, but I can certainly relate. 🙂

(That’s Ben with the dimples. The epic Viking dimples.)